20 Years Living with Diabetes

From my LiveJournal...circa 2019

This year [2019] marks 20 years that I have had Diabetes. The first two years I controlled it with diet and exercise alone, but I was exercising 7 days a week.

I don't buy sweets at home or drink soda or any of that much anymore.  I love to drink water. I recently stopped eating rice.  I watch what I eat most of the time now. Recently I was riding my bike but it's gotten cold/wet and dark sooner. So, I'm thinking of joining a gym for the winter months.

The thing is most people get diabetes in their old age, so by the time, it gets this bad they are much older than me. I got it at 29, so I have had it for 20 years but I'm only 49.  I feel like mine although genetic on my mom's side was primarily stress-induced.  I had wound on my stomach that wouldn't heal. I still have the mark.  I went to the doctor and my BGL was over 300.  They wanted to hospitalize me at the time. I find it funny now because I have had it so much higher than that now and they just send me home.

I went to see the eye doctor yesterday to get my glasses and agreed to pay a fee to get a deeper exam that sees behind my eyes.  They said I have bleeding in the back of both my eye, cataract (worsened by the diabetes being out of control), and fluid that is leaking.  Because of those issues, they could not get my vision to 20/20 and the cylinder in my left eye is -5, where historically it was a -4. The good thing is I have much better vision insurance and I can get the lenses replaced within 4 months of obtaining my original pair.  My goal is to lower my A1C by 5 points in the next three months and for that, I have to eat very healthily and avoid carbs and sugars at all costs.

I had already scheduled an appointment with the ophthalmologist on the 18th of next month not realizing that I had any of those issues and was planning on canceling until I found out. I may have to get shots in my eyes, take medicine, or both. I'm pretty scared to get the shots in my eyes but I have to do what I have to do. I already felt motivated to avoid all food bad for me because I don't want to end up like my brother.  The shots in the eyes are an imminent reminder that I can't give up — a warning before things get worse.

The Freestyle Libre is a flash monitor with a sensor on my arm to monitor my levels more closely.  I wear each sensor for 14 days but I always have to have it on.  It's getting harder and harder to control my levels and the stress is just making it harder — ya ves que a veces ni sabemos que el cuerpo esta bajo stress a veces.

My main goal right now is to eat better so I can take less insulin and lower my A1C.